Intellectual Property Forum The Intellectual Property Forum

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:

The forum software has been upgraded.  New registrations are not currently permitted while we iron out any bugs and other matters.  Please report any problems you find.

Author Topic: "Patent Examiner" is a lousy job title... lets think of something better  (Read 1314 times)

u2ishorrible

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 9
    • View Profile
    • Email
"Patent Examiner" is a lousy job title... lets think of something better
« on: 09-24-10 at 10:24 am »
SO...

I've noticed when I meet people, particularly girls, at bars or wherever, and it gets to the point in the conversation where they ask what I do.  I tell them I'm a Patent Examiner, and almost always I get a dumbfounded look (sometimes people have trouble remembering what a patent is... those people are idiots).  Patent Examiner just sounds really mediocre even though its not.  So I wanted to know if anyone has thought of a more clever way to present the job.  Maybe something like Patent Judge or Invention Detective.  Ideas?
Logged

DogDayPM 9er9er9er

  • Lead Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 999
    • View Profile
Re: "Patent Examiner" is a lousy job title... lets think of something better
« Reply #1 on: 09-24-10 at 11:19 am »
You should try "Federal Government Employee", bet that'll get the chicks throwing themselves at your feet.













(Dangit!  Bit my tongue.)
Logged
Any and all disclaimers you may see on this forum used by members more experienced and/or smarter than I, are hereby incorporated by reference as if fully set forth herein.

Wiscagent

  • Lead Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1405
    • View Profile
Re: "Patent Examiner" is a lousy job title... lets think of something better
« Reply #2 on: 09-24-10 at 12:49 pm »
I've seen Albert Einstein described as a "patent clerk".  Perhaps you'll have more success with that.

Or you can just make stuff up. 

I'm a venture capitalist ... I just haven't found the right business in which to invest my $1.37.

I'm the CEO of Tropical Beach Resorts. ... Unfortunately all I have done so far is make up the name of the business and my title.

Logged
Richard Tanzer
Patent Agent

MYK

  • Lead Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1168
    • View Profile
Re: "Patent Examiner" is a lousy job title... lets think of something better
« Reply #3 on: 09-24-10 at 01:36 pm »
Tell them that you have the power to grant legal monopolies on crucial technologies.
Logged
Disclaimer: not only am I not a lawyer, I'm not your lawyer.  Therefore, this does not constitute legal advice.

Yet another examiner

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 80
    • View Profile
    • Email
Re: "Patent Examiner" is a lousy job title... lets think of something better
« Reply #4 on: 09-24-10 at 02:04 pm »
Just tell them you are a vampire. Girls are way into the vampire thing nowdays.

Works best at night, though.
Logged

Robert K S

  • Lead Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 874
    • View Profile
Re: "Patent Examiner" is a lousy job title... lets think of something better
« Reply #5 on: 09-24-10 at 04:24 pm »
How about...

"Rejection Formulator"?

"Despot of Alexandria"?

"Pit Stop On the Way To the BPAI"?

I kid.  (Somewhat.)
Logged
Only after final does the fun begin.
Everybody else's advice disclaimers are herein incorporated by reference.

u2ishorrible

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 9
    • View Profile
    • Email
Re: "Patent Examiner" is a lousy job title... lets think of something better
« Reply #6 on: 09-26-10 at 07:58 pm »
Great work guys.  I'm just gonna stick with CEO of Tropical Beach Resorts.  Pants will drop.
Logged

MYK

  • Lead Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1168
    • View Profile
Re: "Patent Examiner" is a lousy job title... lets think of something better
« Reply #7 on: 09-26-10 at 09:09 pm »
Remember to doodle a palm tree on your business cards before handing them out.  Maybe get a rubber stamp for that.
Logged
Disclaimer: not only am I not a lawyer, I'm not your lawyer.  Therefore, this does not constitute legal advice.

JustAnotherExaminer

  • Senior Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 382
    • View Profile
Re: "Patent Examiner" is a lousy job title... lets think of something better
« Reply #8 on: 10-12-10 at 05:28 pm »
My line is:

I'm a representative of the United States of America in matters of Intellectual Property Law.

 ;D
Logged
 



Footer

www.intelproplaw.com

Terms of Use
Feel free to contact us:
Sorry, spam is killing us.

iKnight Technologies Inc.

www.intelproplaw.com

Page created in 0.079 seconds with 16 queries.